BRAND RADIO - "It's A Mother"
:60

SFX: PHONE RINGS

MAN: Leave a message.

SFX: BEEP!

CLEVELAND: (LIKE AN ETHNIC MOTHER) What is this? Screening your calls now? That’s nice… PICK UP! I know you’re there. This is Cleveland. Your city. Remember me? (DISHING OUT GUILT) You don’t call. You don’t drop by. What? Now, you’re too good for me? You move to the suburbs and suddenly you’re The Big Shot? I gave birth to you for crying out loud! And this is the thanks I get? Tossed aside like I’m yesterday’s lunch? You’re hurting me, you know that don’t you? You’re hurting me and I feel like you don’t care what happens to me. Seriously. Would it kill you to visit me once in a while? For a few hours? Who knows? you might actually have fun!

So, do something right for a change. VISIT ME!

Bye honey, love ya.

SFX: PHONE HANGS UP

ANNCR: The city of Cleveland misses you. A lot. And the city would really appreciate some genuine quality time with you. So please. Make an effort to come downtown for a visit. It’s the least you can do.

SFX: BEEP!

CLEVELAND: I mean…God forbid something happen to me and you don’t see me…(SIGH) but I don’t want to be a burden…(STARTS TO CRY)

ANNCR: Cleveland. (PAUSE) It’s A Mother.
Paid for by the Society to Keep Cleveland Busy for the Weekend.